Super Mario Galaxy… As Seen By A Goomba


Super Mario Galaxy has many good qualities.  The graphics are great, even for a Wii game.  The levels are all varied and very creative.  The controls work well, even for someone with no hands like me.  There is one very big downside to this game though.  That bastard Mario continues to kill us Goombas.  Even when we leave the planet he finds a way to follow us so he can keep on jumping on more of us.  Who told that dumb plumber that we were his enemies?  We can’t help it that if he walks into us he dies.  We are just trying to go on about our day and all of a sudden some jerk off is coming down from the sky to stomp on our heads.  What the hell!  Do we shoot anything at him like some of our plant friends in Mushroom Kingdom?  Do we jump at him like he does to us so often?  No, all he ever sees us little Goombas doing is slowly walking around.  I guess that walking without Prince Mario’s permission is against the law.  O wait, he hasn’t even gotten Peach in bed for all the times he has rescued her, so I guess he isn’t a prince.  We can’t even run away from the psycho with our little legs.  Please, Nintendo, take us Goomba out of future Mario games so that bastard will leave us alone.  You can keep the Koopa Troopas though, those guys are crazy.

  • Jacob Hruska (snakeman555)

    LOL this is funny!