Game Review: Dream Wife
Release: August 30, 2010 (update)
Developer: Carl R Andrews & David Orion
Available Platforms: iPhone/iPod Touch
ESRB Rating: Rated 4+
Do you ever get tired of your wife’s constant nagging? Take out the trash. Pick up your clothes. Put the toilet seat down. It never ends! Now you can make the most of those precious moments when she’s not home to experience what it would be like to have your very own dream wife.
Dream Wife is a soundboard app that brings every man’s fantasy to life. Just choose the recording that you feel fits the situation and bask in the warmth of a submissive female who wants nothing more than to please her man. Phrases she’ll utter include things like “Honey I don’t mind when you fart under the sheets, you’re like my little personal Potpourri”, and “I agree Honey, kissing is highly over rated, just high five me again…same thing”. This is a funny app that will have you and your guy friends standing around it listening to the over 100 clips while the women will roll their eyes in disgust.
While Dream Wife packs in a lot of sound bytes for your money, the sound quality leaves a little to be desired. This could be a by product of trying to keep the app at a reasonable size, or just lower quality recording equipment. Either way, it’s a bit noticeable, even on the iPhone’s tiny speakers. It’s also worth noting that once you’ve listened to all of the Dream Wife’s quips, the fun is pretty much over. There’s not a lot of replayability unless you whip your phone out during a party with people that haven’t heard it. Even then the laughs will only last around 10 minutes.
A dollar will buy you a short bit of entertainment with this app. If you like jokes about marriage and you’re a little masochistic, this will app will definitely give you some chuckles. As a soundboard app, it’s simple and effective. Just don’t expect your real wife to adopt the traits of your dream wife.